Emotional Terrorism: Are We Our Own Terrorist?
We’ve all been there, finding ourselves bashing another person for how they look, what they like, how they live or what color socks they have on. Or you’ve been in the position to be judged for whatever reasons someone is choosing to judge you for. The culprit? Ourselves, our neighbors, our Facebook friends, our families or even strangers at the grocery store. The sentiment behind emotional terrorism is the notion that people literally break down another person by harassment, judgment, or just being hateful or rude. There are many ways to attack a person and many ways to be attacked.
The term is loosely defined as being undefinable. It can be shaped to the person that is terrorizing or the person being terrorized. It can be verbal altercations, or it can be a form of verbal gossip. It can be mind games played by a person or it can just be the state-of-mind that one inflicts on themselves. Anytime someone takes the emotional route, but in a negative way, could be considered an emotional terrorist. Since everyone has had those moments of judgment or being judged, we need to figure out a way to check this type of mentality.
As much as one would like to believe they are numb to the attacks or even exempt from causing someone pain with their judgement, is a preconceived notion not to be taken lightly. Don’t think that just because you are talking behind someone’s back or saying petty things about a person that this is any more or less severe than a full blown verbal attack or an all out abusive situation. Terrorism is terrorism no matter how big or small the act of terrorizing is.
You are your own person and in charge of how you perceive things and how you experience emotions.
A few things we can do to help check ourselves from being emotional terrorists:
We can stop ourselves from the word vomit that spews from our mouths if we think someone is too fat.
We know how easy it can be to tell someone they are stupid on Facebook because they are less educated than us or believe in something other than what we believe. We need to reevaluate how we deliver these types of judgments. Our youth is watching and absorbing our actions and we need to be the example.
Next, we can evaluate how we receive those types of judgments.
Should we fight fire with fire? Are you strong enough to turn away if someone says something negative to you or about you? These struggles are ones that you will have to determine on your own. Once you figure out your triggers and what you won’t tolerate, then you carry yourself with that conviction. If you don’t mind the negative because you are better than that, then exhibit restraint. Show those around you that even though those actions may have been messed up, you are in fact better than that and are choosing to not feed into the negativity.
Lastly, set limits and follow through.
If someone continuously pushes your buttons, tell them. Shame on you if you continue to sit on your feelings for no other reason than to avoid confrontation. Those may happen, but if you deliver correctly then you can speak your piece and move on. If you do this and the negativity still occurs, cut those people off. Life is too short to fight for your sanity because someone else wants to continuously make you feel bad.
You are your own person and in charge of how you perceive things and how you experience emotions. If you are the “crazy” girlfriend or the fiesta friend, then you need to rethink your stance on life. Only you can change you and how you view things that happen. Good luck on your emotional journey to change the things you can.