How Do We Not Have These Emojis?
Thank goodness the world has come a long way with emojis in the last couple years. We finally have the ability to select the race of any people emojis! Not to mention having an avocado and a middle finger when the mood fits. #bigwin
BUT in my opinion there are some glaring gaps and in-balances still in the selection of emojis that have started to affect my day to day life.
Few people realize there is actually a committee dedicated to selecting and coding any new additions to the emoji family – Unicode. Yes, this is a real job.
There is a way to submit new emoji ideas to them if you’re willing to navigate their labyrinth of a website and jump through lawyer-like hoops with an official proposal form. I, on the other hand, will forgo wasting hours of my life figuring that out and complain on a public platform instead.
Because that’s what millennials do, right?
Why are we living in a world where there is a red and green apple option but only red wine and no white varietal? WHAT DID WHITE WINE EVER DO TO YOU UNICODE?!
May I suggest that we do away with all the stupid plain clocks? Has anyone ever even used those in the history of their existence instead of just typing the time? Don’t even know what I’m referring to because you’ve never needed them? Yeah, that’s what I thought. They are located right before the flags of every country.
Why are there two different kinds of keys, three versions of a lock, and every goddamn phase of the moon, but no superhero emojis?
If none of these observations have struck a chord with you yet, then at least hear me when I say:
WHY IS THERE NO GIRAFFE EMOJI?!
The entire animal kingdom seems to have been approved- elephant, tiger, horse, cat, dog, snake, spider, etc- and still no giraffe.
Having a pig AND a separate pig nose is apparently necessary but no giraffe.
How has this affected my life so far?
Well, thank you for asking. As a 5 foot 10 inch woman I personally identify with the giraffe as my spirit animal and feel the need to use a giraffe emoji as a caption of any photo of me in heels.
This year I have had the privilege of meeting and feeding a giraffe… while I was on a vineyard tour drinking white wine.
Imagine my dismay as I posted the most perfect Instagram photo with my new giraffe friend with white wine in hand and had NO EMOJI for the occasion!
Unicode I implore you to think about your decisions more carefully in the future and please do not continue to exclude one of the most majestic creatures on the planet in favor of fake ones. If a newly designed dragon, or unicorn, or dare I say tenth monkey, make their debut before an regular colored giraffe I may swear of emojis altogether.